Waxing Gibbous

The moon is not full but I feel it’s pull. Even as it appears time is spiraling out of control… the moon remains predictable.

It’s late and instead of sleeping after another very busy day, my mind won’t stop weaving intricate webs of entanglement.

It’s almost as if my emotions are the insects feeding the spider so it can keep spinning the silk that lures me into a perpetual trap.

Self reflective introspective pondering, wandering the deep shadows within some invisible liminal space.

I often look at the moon and it makes me feel as if life is all a dream. How is that we are somehow alive on this lush planet floating in space warmed by a giant star. That wild fireball we call the sun that flings things that dance and light up the night sky on rare occasions.

The steady reflections on that cool rock that orbits our earth like a loyal & faithful yet quiet and small friend. The moon always affecting our mood as it pulls at the waters within and around us and yet still a reminder that we are somewhere lucky in the Milky Way galaxy.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the should’s and wish I could’s, running on the hamster wheel of the human rat race, but is it even more overwhelming to stop and feel for a moment the oddness that we exist at all.

What is this life for? Sheer entertainment?

I suppose being nothingness and everythingness is perpetually boring so we have evolved to be the opposite. Fractured star dust aware of itself as separate, as something, feeling important and powerful yet we are so small and insignificant.

Out of the web I’ve woven as I lie in bed, thumbs tapping on the liquid crystal display, ready to push a button that means anyone anywhere in the world at any time can read the words I’ve just written. Isn’t it all just crazy? Am I the only one who thinks/feels/wonders like this?

I’m sure I’m not. It was just another thought.

I’ve been training for a triathlon- exercising a lot- juggling projects and all I want to do sometimes is be, to lay under the giant day star and not have to worry about anything but each breath I get to take. But I’m a human doing, not a human being… and right now I should be going to sleep. So sweet dreams whether you’re reading this day or night.

You are beautiful!